On my mind....

I'm awake. I can't sleep.

It's three days until by 23rd birthday, but all I can think about is what I need for my future.
A house to call my own home (expensive taste gives me anxiety when I think about the extra costs I'm going to incur with:

• Concrete flooring
• Timbre flooring
• Porcelain tiling
• Armadillo & Co. rugs
• Furniture 
• Kitchen appliances
• Manchester and Linens
• Custom made kitchen
• Shutters
• Entertaining area
• Fire place
• Upgraded cornicing and skirting boards
• High ceilings

The list goes just keeps growing !

Everyone around me is getting new houses and it's not that I'm jealous or envy their lifestyles, but it makes me wonder what have I wasted my past few years of life doing? Uni has been super important to me and working out what I actually want to do with my life. I actually have savings now and it feels so good seeing it grow. 

But why wasn't I doing this before?
Am I too immature about my future and in a dream world when I need to be realistic about my life?

I've always wanted the lovely husband, living in a beautiful home with two or three children to put in the Range Rover but is this all things I should be concerned with right now? Am I asking for too much? Baby clock is always ticking but it just seems like it is OK now to wait until you're 30 to finally be called a 'Mummy'. I'm just scared that it'll come to my early thirties to finally start trying for a baby and it won't happen. I think it's OK for me to worry about the concerns women can have with trying to conceive later than expected and it is something I truly need to think about. 

There's still my goal to have a boutique store in Bali but am I now reaching out of my limits and should I return back to Earth? Is it more realistic to think about having a store here in Sydney that is just inspired with Bali?


Maybe I need to step back and appreciate what I already have.
I've got two amazingly supportive parents who would do anything for me and who still love one another after 29 years of marriage. A funny and honest boyfriend who tells it to me straight and pushes me to succeed at everything. A job that has given me the opportunity to take my first step into the interior world, true friends who are there for a good laugh and advice over wine and cheese, and a perfect little puppy who never leaves my side.

God only gives us what he thinks we can handle at a time. 
Think more minimalist and be thankful for what I do have, understand what I want and set it as a goal. Not everything has to happen at once.